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[Wednesday,
August 22nd, 2007 @ 10:01am] |
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mood |
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 sad |
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i havent writen in this stupid thing since april. so much has happened in that time, so much we've gone through- there are no words to decribe it all. senior project, being sick at prom, senior banquet. graduation. this entire summer.
graduation wasnt hard cuz i knew i had the whole summer with my friends. i dont even leave for a week an a half but summer is over now.
iv left friends before, and theyve left me but that hasnt really happened in 4 years.
danielle jsut left for college this morning and i cant handle it at all. its just the way i am. shes been there for me every single day of high school. i know its not like im never going to see her again- but im not going to see her for a while. i hate it. im so sad. this really really sucks.
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[Thursday,
April 12th, 2007 @ 10:33pm] |
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mood |
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 nostalgic |
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k soo tomorrow is my last day of high school ever. my last day of getting up to be at school by 740ish. last a,b,e,f,g,h block. its so insane! i dont even know where the time went but all i know is that as sad and nostalgic as i am, its time. its time to move on and grow up to bigger things. (such as senior project :p) its just so weird though. theres no point in holding on to that sterotypicalness of hs, but we all want to in some way. im glad i got through it though. woo.
and so yea easter was last sunday and it was one of the shittiest easters everr :) we had to stand in the very back like window of the church as in not even in the church, the lobby. star of the sea is so pointless because you dont hear about jesus resurrection, you hear about father steel's lame life. then i drove to lowell where it hit me that my grandfather really did die. it wasnt my imagination and that hes not there and hes not coming back. it was weird. we went to his grave though. then it was another hour drive to natick to visit my other grandfather in the hospital. poor guy.. then i had a migrane and was nausious by 9 and had to drive home. yay easter!
oh! and i saw keri on the way out and she told me steve died. steve is a 19 year old kid from natick who i know kinda sorta well who is now dead from durg overdose. yeaaa... i think itd be appropraite to say "hugs not drugs"
but thats that. and all i can thik about is tomorrow is my last day of high school except i dont know what to think anymore. im nervous about my senior project but i know ill end up enjoying it.
cheers to the class of '07! ;)
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[Tuesday,
March 27th, 2007 @ 9:24pm] |
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mood |
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 blah |
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so saturday i went to suffolk and i actually liked it. i mean i dont like it anywhere near as much as i love northeastern. but i think i could deal with going to suffolk. the classes seem really good and i love the dorms and i really hope i get one. and ben treadwell is going too so that makes me feel better. suffolk is smack in the middle of boston which is also very cool.
yay <3
saturday night was the wicked awesome gospel concert that thankfully wasnt long at all.
sunday was together in harmony, the last one for us seniors. it was kinda weird. and i hated some of the songs we sang. swampscott is so amazing and they did people will say were in love and it was like all jazzy and cool. lumi sang miss independent and it was ok, not our best but we still had fun. :) overall it was a fun day.
yesterday we started self defense and its amazing :) hahaha and yesterday marked one year and six months that dave and i have been dating! yayyyyyyy.
and so just when i thought things couldnt get any worse in my life, because of my gramps, and drama fest and then ofcorse northeastern... they did get worse.
after school ms roeder informed us that our trip to disney world for the nationals of the championship of hs capella.. is cancelled. granted, its cancelled for valid reasons- nchsa went bankrupt and too many people dropped out of the competition.. and the poor guy who started nchsa is a complete mess and even had a heart attack. were all still realy upset. this was the #1 thing was was looking forward to. more than prom more than white water rafting and more than graduation. it really really really sucks.. and i really really wanted to go to disney. theres nothing that can be done.. but its still like.. watt the fukkkk. :/
.......
last night ws the hockey bannquet so cheerng at mhs is officially over for me. done no more. i got the coaches award though :) like i said, ill miss the actually cheering not really the team or anything. i mean the shit that i dealt with was too much. and iv never met a group of peopple who hate me so... fuck it. im cheering in college which is more than them. i will miss kat times a million and teague, nelly and erin, wendy. and ofcorse the coaches. theyve given me so much that i can never thank them enough for.
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[Friday,
March 23rd, 2007 @ 3:38pm] |
Honestly, WHAT THE FUCK.
im so irritated. life fucking sucks.
WHY DO PEOPLE LIKE WHO HAVE SHITTY GRADES AND DONT DO ANY FUCKING EXTRA CIRR. GET INTO MY NUMBER ONE AND ONNLY SCHOOL!??!?!?!??!!!!!!!!!!!
i secretly hate all of the people who got in and dont want to go. fuck you. you know why? because thats the only school i want to go to. i dont want to go to suffolk, emmanuel, lesley, wheelock or lasell. i dont like those schools, ok? i bet you atleast like some of the other school you applied to. i dont. so thanks. thanks for fucking up my future.
i spent all of high school working my ass off, doing everything i could to show im capable of success and that i belong there. and because 30,000 fucking people applied who probably 29,000 of them DONT EVEN FUCKING WANT TO GO.. i have to be miserabele now.
this is not over exaggerating.. im not looking forward to prom, or graduation or anything to go with leaving high school and going into college. how am i when im stuck going to a place i hate. and it is the people who applied fault because then northeastern ahd to randomly choose. cuz thats basically what the lady told me.... so fuckin super.
I HONESLTY MIGHT AS WELL GO TO HIGH SCHOOL FOR ANOTHER 4 YEARS. it doesnt matter to me. i rather go to high school again.
northeastern was my school. i fit perfectly there. everything iv done since spetemebr of 2003 was a waste. i dont see how its not.
and i cant fucking transfer because i dont make friends easily. so its gonna take me a whole year to actually make friends, then i just leave and have do it all over again?!?!? but its not even about friends. its the school. im not the kind of person who does moving well.
i wanted to start college at northeastern period. so fuck u if youre someone who truely ruined it for me. sorry to be a bitch but im that upset. you dont cry for 2 hours for nothing. what makes me mad is i wouldnt have done that to someone, whether i know them or not.
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[Monday,
March 19th, 2007 @ 11:35pm] |
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mood |
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 crazy |
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if i dont fuking find out from northeastern this week im going to go insane. and like the real insane. not just marat sade insane.
AHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! PLEASE JUST LET ME GET IN! I HAVE TO GO THERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRA
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[Sunday,
March 18th, 2007 @ 12:05am] |
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HAPPY ST PATRICKS DAY!!!!! even though its technically not anymore.
oh well.
fest was cancelled today :( but its tomorrow. i went to a boring but semi interesting flower show in boston today with my mommy my aunt and my grammy and my stepdad. i finally got to go home at like 4. then after random fighting dave and i went out :) we had tacos at danielles and there was fun people there and i personally had a fun time. and then things got awkward so dave and erica and i decided to book it. but it was a nice gathering. besides, i had to atlaast watch SOME of luck of the irish <3 <3 <3 oh how i love that movie =D i missed it last year along with hocus pocus. gr. but this year is better.
i really hope we move on tomorrow. i love our cast. we have so much fun <3 it would jsut be so awesomely awesome to make it to states. ah! come onnnnn marat sade! :p hehe
so yay for going to westford tomorrow. lets make it an awesome day.
ps, i heart my st patricks day theme! hahahaaaa
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| i have been neglecting my lame livejournal for 2 months :) |
[Friday,
March 16th, 2007 @ 11:04pm] |
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mood |
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silly |
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so a shit load has happened to two months.
i had my crazyy ass weekend with midwinter arts festival including marat sade, the a capella competiton and then the nec cheering competition.
( really long weekendy thing.. )
so then exactly a month ago ( then the worst possible thing happened in less than a day. )
after that...... march came all of a sudden and 2 weeks/ a week ago more important stuff happened such as ( DRAMA FESTIVAL!!! and cheering!! (states competiton) )
um so now like current stuff.. drama fest semi finals is possibly tomorrow in westford where apparently my long lost annoying neighbor in natick, nicki chick goes. but anywayyyyy! it might be post poned till sunday in that case im going snowboarding. today i attemped to get a prom dress and its such a long story that gives me a headache but basicalyl im going to be happy and look goregeous either way haha. so anyway im still waiting to hear fomr northeastern. anyy day now :/ i need to friggen go there. theres a monthish left of school for senior project people. btw somehow we pulled of 2 kick ass nights of senior show. haha it was crazy and fun and i loved it. i also <3 my bf haha. no i do. really really. oh! tomorrow is totally st pattys day haha. im irish too ;) but yeaa that shud be about it surprisingly.
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[Friday,
January 19th, 2007 @ 4:20pm] |
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it actually makes me physically sick to my stomach...
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[Sunday,
January 14th, 2007 @ 10:13pm] |
it makes me sick...
sometimes i wish itd just be over with with no heartache.
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